Quotes
RamitSethi: ok we will be funny
for the first few weeks, good point
RamitSethi: funny buttonL on
PopeDoug3: just the first few weeks
PopeDoug3: till we become a trend
PopeDoug3: and people will like us because they think they're supposed to like
us
braina4: you name it i cook it
PopeDoug3: and says "wait,
let me try to get it again"
PopeDoug3: so like 30 seconds later I hear him playing jay-z in the background
RamitSethi: i am having trouble believing he his white
RamitSethi: hm, MS, MD, MPH,
MBA i think
RamitSethi: i think it would be amusing if you have all of those highly qualified
degrees, and then a degree of podiatry thrown in there just for kicks
RamitSethi: HAHAHHA
RamitSethi: DID YOU NOTICE MY PUN
RamitSethi: PODIATRY, KICKS
RamitSethi: HAHAHHAHAHA
PopeDoug3: forgive me
PopeDoug3: for missing your brilliance
RamitSethi: yeah man
RamitSethi: its good shit, im bringing it to school
PopeDoug3: heh cool we can hide in our room and do it
RamitSethi: btw, my cell #
is [xxx-xxx-xxxx], it'll be on that day
VLoveu2: shit boy you blinging
VLoveu2: im not going to mess with you anymore
PopeDoug3: I need to waste 10 more hours before I can go to sleep again
vasb2: alright, i have to go but there is a tall brunette down the hall named samantha and a blonde whose name i dont know who are very hot, in fact i think they may be in the wrong college
Royalbmf: chips CAN be sketchy
PriNceSs S i M z: yeah sup
RamitSethi: same as 23 seconds ago, you?
PriNceSs S i M z: same
RamitSethi: this could be the shortest conversation ever
PriNceSs S i M z: yeah
What the hell kind of incoherent message is this?
TheCoolPreet: hhahahhahah
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Auto response from RamitSethi: away, leave message and perhaps be forwarded
by my secretary
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TheCoolPreet: your secratary
TheCoolPreet: ya my ass u have one
TheCoolPreet: the only secratary u have is your owo friekn hand
TheCoolPreet: but if u ever did then u must have a bitch
TheCoolPreet: which is easy to beleive
RamitSethi: he said i was rude as hell to him, which i dont believe
RamitSethi: apparently he introduced himself and i blew him off
RamitSethi: i am nice
vasb2: to everyone except mexicans
vik151: so hey i purposely
misplaced your cell phone number
RamitSethi: are you asking for it again
vik151: no, just letting you know i dont care for it
RamitSethi: i hate you so much
vik151: ;-)
RamitSethi: keep winking, ill poke your god damned eye out so you are in a perpetual
wink
RamitSethi: cripple ass pirate and shit
vik151: you forget that my dad is an opthalmologist
RamitSethi: DAMN YOU ARE RIGHT
vik151: he can get a shipment of fresh human eyes quicker than you can pull
up a relevant internet link
vasb2: every other conversation i overhear while waiting in line is between two chinese people talking about computers
RamitSethi: i heard you got
the big room
vasb2: how the hell did you hear that?
RamitSethi: remember who you're talking to
vasb2: why do i even talk to you?
etirebiter: i need to learn
more myself
RamitSethi: learning is hard
etirebiter: quite
etirebiter: so is my penis
vasb2: people here are just like "hi im joe white guy, i had a 1600, 5 perfect ap scores, was president of 9 clubs, am a world class swimmer, and built houses in honduras this summer, whats your name?"
vasb2: so you talked to my
mom at tj maxx
RamitSethi: oh my
RamitSethi: the tables have turned
vasb2: indeed
RamitSethi: yes i did have a rendezvous at that establishment
vasb2: now i know all about you
RamitSethi: what is there to know
vasb2: i have no idea
DianAgraz: hey we can start
a small business
DianAgraz: i advertise and refer customers to you
RamitSethi: it sounds suspiciously like i would be your pimp
RamitSethi: you just sell yourself, and the profits will hopefully roll in
DianAgraz: hopefully?
DianAgraz: what is that supposed to mean?
RamitSethi: i talked to a
real mexican today
vasb2: LIAR
RamitSethi: i have proof.
vasb2: knife wound?
RamitSethi: the first thing
i would do is buy a mink coat and cane, along with a hat with a feather in it
DianAgraz: I think you have been planning this for a long time
vasb2: how nice, my first friday night in college and im am discussing the possible perils of alcohol while god only knows what kind of debauchery is going around about me
RamitSethi: i am going to
prison for something or the other, that i have decided
RamitSethi: its just a matter of time, our little crew should start a pool
davisflow: hmm, sounds like some scheme where you would take my money and i
would somehow end up in prison, i think i will not be a part of that shit..
THANK YOU!
RamitSethi: i just finished
listening to the michael jackson song from Free Willy
RamitSethi: good song
vasb2: thanks, you just made me feel a little bit better about my life
Z1vt: you sound like a slave trader
RamitSethi: so you are suggesting
that most indian girls are gold-dggers
TheCoolPreet: ummmmmmmmm
TheCoolPreet: come on man
TheCoolPreet: its obvious
Z1vt: i don't particularly care where they are, they will be found
vasb2: im unfotunately not good with rope, if i were i wouldnt be in this position
sixela232: john singleton should make a movie about you
vasb2: did you just say posh?
vasb2: thats one giant step towards homosexuality
Z1vt: this is bad news
PopeDoug3: how so?
Z1vt: i count on ramit to make me feel better about myself
vasb2: if it makes you feel better, at any given point in time i am probably more unhappy than you are
PopeDoug3: I HAVEN'T LEFT THE HOUSE IN 10 DAYS = MISERABLE
vasb2: i think my speech was slurred because she appeared frightened when i talk to her
raquel7282: i don't cook for these other bitches
RamitSethi: they were "all
iced out"
RamitSethi: i found out its a new term today
RamitSethi: ice = refers to DIAMONDS
RamitSethi: so when a woman is iced out
RamitSethi: she has the 'white diamonds' all up in her jewelry, etc
PopeDoug3: I will never ever have to use that term
raquel7282: i don't know i
just haven't talked to you in a while
RamitSethi: how could you bear it
raquel7282: i couldn't
RamitSethi: cried every night?
raquel7282: yep
RamitSethi: looked at my picture and caressed it?
raquel7282: uh...no
PopeDoug3: did I tell you
I had a dream
PopeDoug3: that we both got to the dorm to move in at the same time
RamitSethi: you dream about me?
PopeDoug3: that's pretty much where the dream ended
PopeDoug3: unless you count the mansex
SarahImmoos: my teeth are falling out and every time I take a step my bones break
RamitSethi: we havent ever
yelled at someone in a theatre yet
vasb2: next time we have to tag team them
RamitSethi: hell yes
RamitSethi: one will say "TURN THAT OFF"
RamitSethi: the other can yell "JESUS CHRIST"
vasb2: we have sad lives
vasb2: at least i do
vasb2: because im going to be looking forward to that for the next 4 months
RamitSethi: she took it surprisingly
well
RamitSethi: she just laughed a little and said something nonchalant
vik151: stupid bitch
SarahImmoos: if I talk dirty
she likes it
RamitSethi: thats kinky
SarahImmoos: ok yes it is kinky
SarahImmoos: very kinky
SarahImmoos: but it's what gets me through the days
SarahImmoos: god knows I couldn't do it alone
SarahImmoos: I don't even know what I'm talking about
raquel7282: oh yeah ramit i am soo kinky
RamitSethi: your warning is
an interesting number
JaTTiMoB: i know
RamitSethi: it is 69
RamitSethi: your silence is at once saddening and encouraging
RamitSethi: saddening, in that i am having a one-sided conversation
RamitSethi: encouraging, in that at least this woman knows her role: silence
RamitSethi: you may comment
[25 seconds go by...]
JaTTiMoB: bitch please
AngelEyez743: "at least u didnt reject me openly and bluntly like most girls"
SarahImmoos: my rachel impression
RamitSethi: HHAHAHAHHAH
tpfeliz727: he basically laughed in my face
VLoveu2: wow. now we're walking on a thin line between pick up moves and sleezePopeDoug3: heh I remember
when you asked me once why I never laugh out loud on IM
PopeDoug3: you seemed so disappointed and confused
vasb2: i figured out the root
of my unhappiness, its quite simple really
vasb2: im awake for about 18 hours a day
vasb2: and i sleep only 6 hours
vasb2: if i can reverse those
vasb2: i think things will be much better
PopeDoug3: that's like the 5th reference between us tonight about how we're in a relationship
RamitSethi: oh my god what
a dope deal!!!!!!
VLoveu2: seriously!
RamitSethi: you are a scam pimp!!!!!!!!!!!1
VLoveu2: no no you are a scam pimp
VLoveu2: can we continue to compliment one another please!!!!!!
raquel7282: what is your favorite baked good?
vasb2: nor do i, but we just bounce back and forth from making fun of people and talking about how depressed i am
PopeDoug3: I sat in lecture every day and thought how badly I wanted to shoot myself in the face
VLoveu2: i have thousands
of songs yet the collection is so mundane
VLoveu2: i crave a new sound
raquel7282: i don't need a book to tell me how to meet rich men
PopeDoug3: since we're so lazy, if the people suck in toyon, we're going to hate life, cuz you know we won't go anywehre
Today I talked to my friend's mom.
RamitSethi: is your mom funny
SarahImmoos: she's more dirty than me
SarahImmoos: ok you can talk to her hold on, it [screen name]
RamitSethi: no way hah
RamitSethi: that would be awkward
[Mom]: Hi Ramit....Sarah wants me to talk dirty to you.....but as I do not know
you...I think that would be rather rude..
[Mom]: Sarah says you are one fine muther...shut you mouth..
[Mom]: I better get back to Sarah...she is getting jealous...
raquel7282: ramit quit hitting on mrs. immoos
Bl4ckf00t: and if my amount
of homework continues to intorduce thoughts of suicide each night, i don't think
i will be able to soon
RamitSethi: oh please its like a 40 minute ride up here
Bl4ckf00t: do you understand that i'm reading about nondeterministic state machines
between typing messages to you?
SarahImmoos: my mom is talking to me and she said that if you marry RAch and I marry my black male companion then we can have a double wedding and it can be very colorful, no racisim intended
adraken: that reminds me, we need to start playing tetrinet to alienate the remaining residents in the hall
RamitSethi: a lot of times,
when you announce some exotic plan, i just think in the back of my head, "lets
see how long this will last"
ManeeshSethi: hmm, same here
ManeeshSethi: "I will graduate from college"
ManeeshSethi: "I will not major in CS"
etirebiter: i will continue my daily regimen of crying while masturbating
LAdancechick: remember when you took that cardboard cutout to a school dance cause you weren't cool enough to get a date
RamitSethi: all the stupid
hos i send email to hardly ever respond, i might just stop sending shit their
way
JaTTiMoB: are u tryin to injcorporate me into that "styupid hpoe"
remark
JaTTiMoB: ok golddigger maybe, loose perhaps,
JaTTiMoB: but stupid hoe!
LAdancechick: that means you're
getting no action, right
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Auto response from RamitSethi: PIMPING HOS LIKE, WELL, ME
adraken: god, i need waulogy
back, i can't stand cardinal.stanford.edu's piece of shit system
RamitSethi: are you unable to sustain an erection because of its absence?
adraken: i am unable to sustain breathing